Natascha McElhone: my family values

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My granny was very concerned that we weren't baptised – Mum had been desperate to escape her own Catholic upbringing. But Granny thought we were blighted. Whenever we turned up at her house, she would flick holy water – from the font she kept by the door – over us, in the hope that it would save us from damnation. She was also full of wonderful sayings: "Don't ever put your head out of the window of the car," she would say. And when we asked why, would reply: "Have you ever seen a doctor with his head out of the window?"

Mum left school at 15 and after a few years of modelling and dating jazz musicians, was married by 21 to my father, Mike Taylor, a journalist on the Daily Mirror. They had my brother and me pretty quickly and had split up by the time I was two. I don't really have any memories of them as a couple. Mum married again – Roy Greenslade, who used to edit the Daily Mirror, and I am so glad and grateful he came along. He was a tremendous influence on me. Roy was a great activist; I have lots of memories of going on marches on his shoulders, and playing in our sitting room, next to Socialist Worker placards, during meetings of the Brighton Marxists. He politicised me but only temporarily, much to his chagrin.

My relationship with my natural father was complicated by his alcoholism. When he was 50, he remarried – Margareta, a Swedish journalist. They had two sons: Alexander and Nicholas. I only see them once a year in Stockholm, but we all look forward to it, especially now I have children – Theodore, nine, Otis, six, and one-year-old Rex – who worship their uncles. Sadly, Dad has Alzheimer's and is in an institution.

You might imagine that having two fathers could be awkward when you get married, but mine handled it in a very cool fashion. At my wedding [to Martin Kelly, who died of a heart attack last year], 11 years ago, Dad walked me up the aisle and Roy made a speech. Dad moved me beyond belief by promising to avoid alcohol for the day and keeping his word. And Roy – true to form – couldn't resist treating guests to a long talk on the Good Friday agreement, which had just been settled.

I'm very different to my mum. I'm not as beautiful as she is, nor – she probably despairs about this – as groomed. I certainly rebelled against her idea of looking well turned-out. I spent several years with a shaved head in jeans and baggy shirts. Even now she is way more hip than I am, and she has a great eye for fashion, which just doesn't do it for me.

Natascha McElhone is supporting the Pampers/Unicef Gift of Life campaign to help eliminate maternal and newborn tetanus by 2012, pampers.co.uk

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